"Let me tell you what’s happening to me. I’m on the PTA at my child’s school, the Secondary School of Journalism in Park Slope. I’m currently advocating on behalf of my child, and seventeen other children whose parents don’t speak English. These kids are from Ecuador, Peru, El Salvador, Dominican Republic, everywhere. These kids have all done very well on their Regent’s exams— I’m talking 90/95th percentile. Very smart kids. They were on their way toward qualifying for an Advanced Regents government scholarship,that would give their parents badly needed money to help in their education. But the fine print of that scholarship says the children need three full years of a foreign language.
And the principal at the school FIRED the Spanish teacher. She is not hiring another foreign language teacher for an entire year, effectively disqualifying all these kids from that scholarship they need. When we try to talk with her about it, she acts like she doesn’t owe us an explanation. When we try to call the Board of Education, they tell us to put it in writing. They get us all excited. They have us think if we write a nice letter, and use good grammar, and use all the correct punctuation, something will happen. Meanwhile another year passes, and nothing. And the kids don’t get their scholarship. You know something like this would never happen at a nice Manhattan school like Stuyvesant.
We’ve got a new mayor and a new chancellor. So we aren’t blaming them. But they need to know how impossible they’ve made it to help our kids. Trying to get something fixed in these schools is like praying to some false God. You call and email hoping that God is listening, and nothing happens. Meanwhile the kids suffer. All these parents that I’m representing are good, simple people. They say: ‘Don’t worry Annette, God is going to fix it. God will make it right.’ I love them. And I love God. But I tell them: ‘God won’t fix it! We’ve got to fix it!’”
I didn’t acknowledge my father tonight.
I treated him like the stranger he’s become. His proud arrogance matched mine.
I haven’t seen the man in almost five years, when I almost died.
Two years ago today my life completely changed. (Those who are close to me know what happened, and those who would like to know can always just ask.) It’s ironic that is was on valentine’s day because since then I’ve constantly been surrounded by love; every direction I’m facing I run into some form of love and I can’t help but be so immensely thankful.
I never thought this would be in the stars for me; looking back, I don’t know how I found those paths that lead me to this beautiful view, but some how I did.
Again, I can’t believe how long ago two years ago feels. It feels like another lifetime, one that won’t be forgotten.
Anyways, happy valentine’s day everyone.
With your head cushioned on my arm
And our legs tangled,
Your chest rising and falling
To the low humming music
All rock me into a deep slumber.
I’m not sure how to sleep alone anymore.
That feeling I get, is how I know.
“I miss you.”
I can tell, my feelings don’t lie.
I was going through my notes and found this. I don’t remember writing this down. It was really something to read this as a stranger.
Edit: the date up at top was updated cause I fixed punctuation.
I’m visiting San Francisco in January. It’ll be my first time seeing the Pacific Ocean. Time to dip into my ‘Traveling Fund’.
"My boyfriend is sick. One of these has got to make him feel better."
It disgusts me that I need to be claimed by another man in order for other men to leave me the fuck alone.
This guy that I went on two dates back in July. Yeah, I know that was six long months ago. He always randomly messages me/texts me/communicates with me. To see if we can rekindle what we never had. and each month I respectfully decline. And Finally today when he i didn’t hear from him in a couple weeks, he texted me again. And out of anger I texted him saying “leave me the fuck alone.” he texted back saying “Nonsense, lets grab dinner, my treat”. After I said “No.” He kept texting back as if this was a challenge. I’m not a fucking game.
I texted him back saying. “I’m in a relationship and we’re exclusive. You need to stop.” I deleted the text thread from my iPhone and I haven’t gotten a reply from him.
I really didn’t want to resort to that. I fucking hate that reason. It’s the least important one. I mean no because I said so. It’s so disrespectful. I’m a bit angry with myself for having to resort to using that as a clutch.
In the past I’ve said no, and said things like: “I’m saying no because I don’t want to.” He just never fucking listened.
I’m really upset at myself. I know I shouldn’t be so hard on myself. But I just can’t believe I needed to use that as an excuse to leave me alone.
I really hate feeling objectified, even though it was a big part of my past.